I started reading Joyce Meyer’s Approval Addiction last night because whether or not I like to admit it, I am an approval addict and I am a people pleaser. While there is nothing wrong with putting in a bit of extra effort with a friendship or working very hard at your job, there is something wrong with doing it solely for the approval of others. There is a very big difference between doing something for approval or acceptance and doing it because you want to.
Trying to please people is a full time job on its own and comes with a lot of pressure, too much pressure in fact. The search for approval/acceptance is never ending and tiring! Is that the way to live? NO! So this one is for all of you who are tired of the pressure, tired of trying but failing (not failing in the mind of others but in your own mind) and for those who struggle to accept themselves.
If I stood in front of you right now and offered you a R100 note would you accept it? Of course you would!
If I crumpled up a R100 note and offered it to you would you still accept it? Without a doubt!
If I stood on a R100 note and then offered it to you, with it being dirty and crumpled up, would you take it? I think you would.
Now, think of yourself as that R100 note. People will still accept and appreciate you even if you are a little rough around the edges. The value of that R100 note does not decrease just because it is slightly dirty and crumpled up! Just like your value as a person does not decrease because you make a few mistakes in life or because not everyone likes you or because people aren’t constantly approving of you.
If you went to the shop with that R100 and didn’t realize the value of it, you could lose out or be ripped off. The same goes for you, if you don’t live life to the fullest because you are too worried about what others think about you or because you can’t accept yourself then you are getting less out of life than you should! You are selling yourself short and the only person who is being ripped off is you.
So I leave you with this – You and I would both accept that R100 and we would see and understand its value, are we going to accept ourselves, see our value and stop relying on approval?
I know I am!
Dita von Teese said it best…..